Nanny News Network

There’s something about the idea of peeking into someone else’s daily life that appeals to the average American, as evidenced by the astounding number of reality television shows that proliferate the airwaves. Even networks like The History Channel and The Learning Channel have shifted their focus from legitimate, educational programming in favor of cheaply produced reality shows with mass appeal. While there is speculation about the level of scripting and prompting on most reality shows, these 10 have faced real allegations of being fabricated on some level, much to the dismay of their devoted viewers.

1. Storage Wars – A&E’s Storage Wars features groups of people attempting to outbid one another for the right to open a sealed storage locker in hopes of discovering items of serious value. A lawsuit against the show’s creators and staff brought by former star Dave Hester alleges that the units are salted before taping to up the drama factor, leaving plenty of viewers with a bad taste in their mouth.
2. Breaking Amish – Ostensibly following the lives of young Amish and Mennonite adults as they explore the world outside of their insular communities for the first time, TLC’s Breaking Amish garnered major praise and a strong fan base. Before the finale of the first season, however, several reports came to light alleging that the stars were lying about their backgrounds, casting doubt on the entire show.
3. Real Husbands of Hollywood – Unlike the other shows on this list, BET’s Real Husbands of Hollywood is a deliberately scripted send-up of Bravo’s Real Housewives franchise and VH1′s Basketball Wives.
4. House Hunters – One of the cornerstones of the do-it-yourself enthusiasts’ network, HGTV’s programming House Hunters follows families as they attempt to find and purchase a new home. Despite the absence of marital tensions, catfights and backstabbing in the House Hunters model, producers are still accused of releasing a fabricated show by former participants.
5. The Hills – A spin-off of MTV’s wildly popular Laguna Beach, The Hills featured a group of pretty young things as they made their way in Los Angeles after graduating from high school. Though the gutsy last scene alluded to the idea that everything in the show had been planned, announcements by cast members that most of the drama was manufactured confirmed the lack of “reality” on set.
6. Cash Cab – The premise of Cash Cab features a group of unsuspecting taxi customers who are picked up in the Cash Cab and promised the chance to make big bucks by answering trivia questions. While the results of the game show are not fixed, the set up and selection process is far less random than the show itself depicts.
7. The X Factor – Among reality shows, talent competitions still reign as king. That’s why it came as a bit of a shock to devoted viewers when a 2011 episode of the Simon Cowell-helmed The X Factor featured a prominent flub pointing to lip-synching. A statement released by a representative did admit that all ensemble performance vocals are canned, leaving many viewers suspicious about the competition itself.
8. Property Brothers – Hosted by a charismatic Canadian brother duo, Property Brothers has faced a barrage of allegations. From their background as actors to the predictability of each episode and the fact that Drew Scott may not even be a licensed realtor, even fans of the show tend to be skeptical about its level of “reality.”
9. Extreme Couponing – Coupon bloggers have been openly discussing their reservations about the way that couponing is depicted on TLC’s show Extreme Couponing, noting the frequent misuse and even outright fraud committed by some participants. Statements from some retailers featured on the show admitting their participation in scripted taping should have put the final nail in the show’s proverbial coffin, but it’s still going strong.
10. Toddlers & Tiaras – The antics of moms and the pint-sized stars on TLC’s runaway hit Toddlers & Tiaras have generated quite a buzz for the show. Maxine Tinnel, a woman who claimed to have staged a handful of pageants for the show, revealed that the formula for taping is to “find the crazy families first, then find a pageant near them.” The staged tapings are closed to spectators aside from family, friends and invited guests, and Tinnel insists that there’s far less drama in real pageants than depicted on the show.

In the world of reality television, viewers are forced to either suspend their disbelief for the duration of the show or accept that what they’re watching may very well be scripted. The low cost of producing a reality show versus a fully-scripted feature series leaves television execs springing for the reality fare over higher-quality programming, which means that viewers’ choices are fairly limited.

If you’ve always dreamed of being a celebrity, but aren’t angling for a career on the silver screen, the overwhelming surge in popularity of reality programming may seem like your golden opportunity. In order to properly capitalize on your dreams of reality stardom, however, you’ll have to master the casting process. While there are no sure-fire tips that will land you a sweet reality gig if you don’t have what the producers and casting professionals are looking for, there are some ways that you can dramatically boost your chances of getting their attention.

Know Your Show

In order to have any chance of progressing through the casting process, you’ll need to make the effort to be as informed as possible about the show you’re auditioning for. While this can be a challenge for brand new shows, you can brush up on your trivia for established shows. During the actual interview process, casting directors will want to see that you have a genuine interest in working on their show, not a general desperation for reality stardom on any show. Make sure that you approach each step of the audition process armed with all possible knowledge at your disposal, and that you’re exhibiting characteristics that will work well within the concept.

Dress for Success

At a massive casting call, opting for something outlandish to grab the attention of producers and set yourself apart from the rest of the group is an understandable mistake. Save your Lady Gaga costumes for Halloween and aim for a look that’s well put together and reflects your personality instead. A few quirky accessories or an original style is one thing; shamelessly ripping off the more outrageous choices of celebrities or deliberately dressing strangely may actually hurt your chances.

Play Up Your Flaws and Quirks

During the casting process, producers and casting directors will usually have a few set personality types that they’re looking for in order to ensure the best cast chemistry. This is where being yourself and honestly portraying your personality quirks can be the most effective strategy you can employ. Rather than attempting to play a role, which seasoned casting directors will be able to see right through, make sure you’re not trying to disguise your natural personality.

Tell the Truth

No producer wants a scandal on their hands, unless it’s one that will boost ratings. If you’re auditioning for a role on a reality show and you’re asked direct questions about your background, you should never lie. Background checks, fact checking and research on all contestants or participants are almost always par for the casting course, and you will be found out. Don’t attempt to obscure a checkered past or invent an entirely new persona for the casting people. You’ll have plenty of time to work on the character you hope to project after you land a role.

Be Available

If you can’t drop everything to hop on a plane for additional meetings, you could very easily miss out on the opportunity of a reality television lifetime. When you audition for a show, clear your schedule as much as possible, or at least avoid making concrete plans. You’ll need to be able to head to a distant location at a moment’s notice if you get the call. On the subject of getting the call, keep the particulars of your cell phone plan in mind. If your phone won’t allow you to accept blocked or private calls, you could very easily miss out on the announcement that you’ve progressed to the next round of casting. Make sure that your phone has no such blocks before you send in your audition tape or show up at an open call to prevent the possibility of losing a chance at stardom due to a technical difficulty.

Before you pursue your 15 minutes of fame, you should consider the far-reaching implications of becoming a public figure. The past can and often does come back to haunt those who find their fame on the small screen, so be sure that you don’t have any life-ruining skeletons lurking in your closet. It’s also wise to prepare yourself for creative editing that could portray your on-air personality in a less-than-favorable light, a fate bemoaned by more than one reality show antagonist. Keep in mind that ratings and high-stakes drama are the name of the game, regardless of how “real” the show purports itself to be.

While it’s partially an unfair gender stereotype to claim that all men are leery about asking for help in certain areas, it does hold true that each of these topics are sensitive for some men. Whether they feel that asking for help is admitting defeat, showing signs of weakness or an indication that they’re not capable of handling something themselves, these are 15 of the subjects of which most men find it difficult to swallow their pride and seek assistance.

1. Home Repairs – The man who refuses to call a plumber or carpenter for home repairs that are beyond his actual skill level is an oft-used trope in sitcoms and romantic comedies. It’s also a common enough occurrence in real life that home improvement gurus feel the need to warn homeowners about the potential dangers and increased expense of tackling a home repair that’s too difficult.
2. Directions – Most men don’t like to ask for directions. It’s such a commonly accepted statement that it’s become ingrained in the cultural consciousness. Whether the reluctance to ask for direction stems from a distaste for admitting a fallible sense of direction or simply from the fact that boys are raised with the idea that men don’t ask for directions, it’s one stereotype that’s based in a bit of truth.
3. Auto Repairs – Some men are mechanically inclined, while others just aren’t. That doesn’t always stop the latter group from crawling under their hood in a vain attempt to make a repair that they know nothing about.
4. Electronics – The masculine fondness for gadgets of the electronic variety makes it difficult for men to admit when they’ve stumbled across something that they can’t properly operate or install.
5. Lawn Work – While many men like to complain about the necessity of caring for the lawn, when it comes down to it, most don’t want anyone helping either because they have very specific ideas about how each task should be handled. Kids are the exception to this rule in the male mind, as they offer free labor.
6. Exercise – Men who are fixated on sculpting a Mister Universe-worthy physique can be completely fixated on that goal, sometimes to the exclusion of all else. Regardless of how invested they are in reaching a goal, however, many are hesitant to ask a gym buddy for workout advice.
7. Depression – Because the word “depression” is inextricably linked with the concept of emotional weakness in so many men’s minds, it can be very difficult to convince a man that he should seek help for his depression.
8. Parenting – Many men dislike the idea of someone telling them how and when to discipline their children on principle alone. As a result, those men aren’t likely to ever ask for parenting advice.
9. Substance Abuse – Admitting to a substance abuse problem is tantamount to admitting weakness and dependency, two things that many men would be horrified to reveal to the world around them. Rather than seeking help, some men will continue to abuse the substance of their choice until it costs them everything.
10. Marital Problems – Marriage counseling is a lucrative business, but it might not be quite so popular if women were as opposed to counseling as many of their male counterparts. When marital problems strike, most men would be more than happy to hash them out privately rather than asking for help from a counselor.
11. Dating – Single men might vent to their buddies about their misadventures in the dating scene, but they aren’t as likely to ask for advice on how to properly navigate the search for love.
12. Insecurities – Everyone has their own set of individual insecurities, but men are more likely to hide them than women. Where females will often readily admit the things that worry them or make them feel insecure, men tend to be less forthcoming on the subject.
13. Financial Stress – Men who adhere to traditional gender roles see themselves as the financial provider for the family, a role they take very seriously. When financial problems rear their ugly heads, most men will take a hit before they ask for a loan.
14. Anxiety Problems – Some people struggle with an anxiety so great that it’s difficult to function normally in society, but macho men will do everything they can to keep those anxieties hidden while they’re in public.
15. Parts Assembly – Whether it’s a kids’ toy or a new bookshelf, the first thing that gets tossed to the wayside when a man is assembling something is the sheet of paper printed with the directions. When the situation gets out of hand because the directions weren’t followed, this same man will probably not admit that the failed project is his fault, blaming it instead on shoddy manufacturing.

The lead-up to a surgical procedure is usually dominated by an exchange of information between you and your surgeon. There can be so many details and so much to keep up with that you may not even realize how many potentially important ones are either being lost in the shuffle or actively swept under the rug. Before you go under the knife, these are 10 of the things that you might want to make a point of asking your surgeon about.

1. Their Board Certification Status – It usually doesn’t occur to a patient to ask if the person who will be performing their surgery is Board Certified, but the truth is that many are not. A surgeon probably won’t disclose that information without first being asked, either.
2. Their Complication Rate – A surgeon who won’t disclose a complication rate or claims not to have one is probably so inexperienced that he hasn’t had time to encounter complications or is actively hiding something from you. According the Chief of Minimally Invasive Gynecologic Surgery at Florida Hospital Celebration Health, “no one is immune to complications.”
3. That There’s A More Conservative, Non-Surgical Method Of Managing Your Condition – In some cases, surgery may actually be the only viable method of treating what’s ailing you. Most of the time, though, there is a more conservative course of treatment that doesn’t include a surgical procedure. Your surgeon, however, is paid roughly 10 times more to perform the surgical procedure than to help you manage it in another, less intrusive way.
4. That A Resident Might Perform The Procedure – Before surgeons become surgeons, they’re residents. Because they have to learn the intricacies of operating through hands-on experience, part or all of your procedure may be handled by a resident with the supervision of an attending physician. If you’re having surgery at a teaching hospital, it’s a good idea to ask your surgeon if he will be overseeing the procedure in its entirety. Before you panic, however, you should also keep in mind that some medical professionals recommend teaching hospitals as the best places to receive cutting-edge, up-to-the-minute care.
5. That You Can Access Your Operative Report – You may be out cold during the procedure, but there is a way to find out what happened in the operating room if you suspect that something went wrong. The operative notes dictated by the surgeon are a record of the procedure, and you can ask to see the report.
6. That Your Weight Can Make Their Job More Difficult – Weight is a sensitive subject for many people, especially those who are packing on more than a few extra pounds. Your surgeon knows this, but he may not let on just how much more difficult caring for an obese patient is. Obese patients are more likely to contract post-operative infections, present a challenge in the placement of central venous catheters and can even be difficult to start an IV in because the veins aren’t always visible.
7. How Much Your Non-Compliance Stresses Them Out – Performing surgical procedures is a career fraught with sources of stress and anxiety, but one of the most difficult ones for many surgeons to manage is the knowledge that her patients may or may not bother to comply with post-operative instructions.
8. They May Be Making More From Your Procedure Than You Realize – You know that your surgeon will be walking away from the table with a pretty penny in his pocket from your insurance company, but you may not realize that he’s making even more from medical device manufacturers through quasi-legal kickbacks.
9. That They’re Exhausted – Rare is the surgeon who will volunteer the information that he’s exhausted and that he may not be quite alert enough to be in top form in the operating room. A surgeon who was on call the night before almost certainly won’t tell you that he didn’t get enough sleep, even if that is the case.
10. Your Procedure May Not Be As Urgent As You Think – Because of the off chance that you could have an unexpectedly sudden reaction as a result of a condition or injury could lead to intense questioning or even allegations of malpractice, most surgeons want to get your procedure completed as soon as possible. While it’s not a good idea to drag your feet after arming yourself with this knowledge, you can use it to ease any anxiety you may feel about the urgency of your condition.

While knowing these things can make surgery seem like an even scarier business, it’s important to understand that taking serious medical decisions into your own hands and refusing the advice of professionals is highly unadvised. There’s nothing wrong with asking for a second or even third opinion, looking for the best surgeon in your area and being actively involved with the process. It is, however, a very bad idea to forgo treatment altogether out of concerns about what your surgeon may not be telling you.

Want to know what your favorite celeb has been up to? Looking for an up-to-date picture of the new Hollywood “it” couple? Get the dish on what A-listers did over the holidays, find out what your favorite actor or musician is up to, get the inside scoop on who’s dating who, and learn what designer the stars have chosen to wear this week. These 27 bloggers have dedicated their blogs to reporting on the happenings of your favorite celebrities, keeping you in the loop about the people who frequent the entertainment industry. Check them out and see if your favorite celebrity was deemed worthy of writing about.

Actors

Fans are always excited to see a celebrity in any capacity, whether it’s out eating at their favorite restaurant, shopping at local boutiques, or socializing at swanky bars.  There are even sites that focus on capturing pictures of celebrity shoes and eyewear, just in case you want to replicate your favorite celeb’s look. The following nine blogs have done their best to get pictures of your favorite actors and actresses and what they’ve been up to.  Take a look, maybe you’ve been to the same place a celebrity was sighted, and if you haven’t, maybe you should go there just in case they come back.

• *Celebrity Sighting* Actor, Darius McCrary, Dines at Meatball Spot at Town Square Las Vegas
• New York Fashion Week Celebrity Sightings
• Photos: ‘Twilight’ Stars in Chicago
• Lower Haight Celebrity Sightings: Actor Josh Hutcherson
• Celebrity Sighting: Actor Romany Malco at Pinkberry
• Celebrity Sightings: Gerard Butler, Madonna, Nadia G, and Kanye West
• Celebrity Sightings in Wilmington as 40+ Stars Gather to Fight Kidney Disease
• Celebrity Kicks Sightings: Actor Tristan Wilds Rockin The Air Jordan III “Black/Cement”
• Celebrity Eyewear Sightings: Sightings for November 2012

Musicians

While some musicians reach ‘super star’ status in no time at all, making it difficult for them to even walk down the street without being mobbed, many others are able to go out in public without having to fight through swarms of paparazzi. See which musicians have been spotted out and about, find out who’s sizzling romantically and who’s calling it quits, and get the scoop on who’s using their fame for good by attending fundraisers and charity events. Head over to these nine blogs to read all about everything from the latest awards show to which local joints have become musician hotspots, and everything in between.

• Celebrity Sightings—51  
• Celebrity Sightings
• Did Everyone See the Chr-Ihanna Sighting?
• Celebrity Sightings
• Metal Celebrity Sightings
• Celebrating Inauguration with Prayers, Celebrity Sightings
• New York Fashion Week Celebrity Sightings: Musicians Step Out in Style for Designers’ Shows
• NAACP Image Awards Celebrity Sightings
• Memorial Day Celebrity Sightings in the Hamptons

The Infamous

Kind of like a train wreck, there are some celebrities that just can’t seem to get it right, keeping the public enthralled and unable to look away. What crazy thing will they do next?  How many times can the same celebrity go to rehab? Is this DUI number three or number four? While many people wish they could walk in the shoes of a celebrity for a day, these celebrities are the exception, as their crazy antics are ones no one wants to replicate. These nine blog entries are all about the things that celebrities have done that have made them more infamous than famous.

• Kris Jenner Haters Get Duped: Facebook Post Calling Out “Hoes” Isn’t Hers
• Lindsay Lohan Sighting!
• Dueling Divas: The 10 Most Infamous Celebrity Feuds
• The Telling Tales of Tori Spelling
• Nelly Added to List of Infamous Texas Celebrities
• Dead or Alive: Infamous Celebrities Who Rule Facebook
• 10 Infamous Crimes Committed by Popular Celebrities
• 10 Celebrities Whose Names Have Been Sullied by Addiction to Drugs and Alcohol
• Britney Spears Meltdown over “X Factor” Firing Pressure

By the end of 2012, the nanny news story that had received the most media exposure was the tragic tale of the Krim children, who were stabbed by their nanny before she turned the knife on herself. Parents around the nation mourned alongside the Krim family, and counted their blessings not to be in their shoes. There were, however, far more stories of courage and inspiration to be found that didn’t receive the same sensational attention of this grisly tale. These 12 nannies were among those to be celebrated, even if their stories didn’t receive national coverage.

1. Emily Rogers – When Emily Rogers learned CPR in order to take a nanny job, she likely never realized that the skills she attained in order to ensure the safety of her charges would one day save a life. Jorge Pedroso was turning blue when Rogers and a bystander, Rebekah Tucker, began the CPR that helped him to survive.
2. Kaitlyn McGrath – Chris Powell may be the celebrity trainer of Extreme Makeover Weight Loss Edition, but the courage of his nanny Kaitlyn McGrath saved his one-year-old son from a carjacker. McGrath escaped her work vehicle with little Cash before anyone was injured.
3. Susane Lavinia Bowden – Great nannies become more like members of the family than employees, a fact that’s proven by the tale of Susane Lavinia Bowden. For 40 years she served as a live-in nanny and housekeeper to the Hoare family; now, as she celebrates her 100^th birthday, her years of service and dedication are being rewarded as her employers care for her.
4. Michael Kenny – Norland College is a renowned British institution for the training of nannies, and was established more than a century ago. Over the decades, Norland has exclusively trained women. Michael Kenny, the first male to be admitted to the school, set a new precedent for breaking down traditional gender roles.
5. Nikki Gribble – Each year, the International Nanny Association chooses one nanny to receive the honor of Nanny of the Year. This year’s recipient, Nikki Gribble, was nominated by her employers for her dedication and excellent professional performance.
6. Cindy Gatson – When a stolen Jeep careened towards Cindy Gatson and her four-year-old charge, she risked her own life to save him. Gatson was clipped by the Jeep’s bumper and was forced to use crutches until she recovered, but her charge escaped the situation unscathed.
7. Vivian Maier – Chicago nanny Vivian Maier might not have received any attention from the media during her 40 years on the job, but she became something of an enigmatic figure of interest after a book full of her photographs was posthumously published.
8. Alexis Barry – She may not be an inspiring figure for nanny employers, but Alexis Barry’s courage in standing up to her A-list employer Robert DeNiro demanding fair payment for more than $40,000 in withheld overtime pay definitely makes her a hero to nannies struggling with job creep and unfair pay.
9. Alyson Myatt – When the Kentucky home of single parent J.B. Hawes caught fire while he was away on business, his 22-year-old nanny rushed barefoot through soaring flames to save her five-year-old charge Aden. While Myatt suffered serious burns, Aden escaped unharmed. Local authorities assert that any hesitation on Myatt’s part would have resulted in Aden’s death.
10. Nosrat Dezfoulian – When a metal roll-down gate collapsed in the Park Slope neighborhood of Brooklyn onto Nosrat Dezfoulian and the toddler she was caring for, she shielded him with her body to the best of her ability. Her head was split open and bleeding profusely, but her charge escaped with only a broken leg due to her quick thinking.
11. Jennifer Anton – The driver of a Chicago Streets and Sanitation truck was clutching an open bottle of brandy and had a blood-alcohol level of more than twice the legal limit when he sped towards Jennifer Anton and her 20 month old charge Tyler. Tyler sustained no serious injuries, but Anton’s legs and pelvis were shattered.
12. Sandra Samuel – The terrorist attack on Chabad House Jewish Community Center in Mumbai left only two survivors, two-year-old Moshe and his nanny Sandra Samuels. Samuels carried Moshe to safety after rescuing him from between the bodies of his parents, risking her own life in the process.

These 12 nannies showed themselves to be truly outstanding members of not only the professional childcare community, but also the world as a whole. In some way or another, they all showed great courage and strength, proving that great nannies far outnumber dangerous ones.

Instant messaging, Twitter and unlimited texting on many cell phone plans have led to a texting craze among today’s youth. Kids will commonly communicate by texting instead of speaking, even when sitting next to each other on the couch. This texting phenomenon is something that is becoming an increasingly large concern to some parents. Instead of worrying about cigarettes, alcohol or drug addiction, they fear their children are becoming addicted to texting.

How do you know if your kid’s texting is getting out of hand? Here are 10 signs your child may be addicted to texting:

1. Calluses on thumbs – Check your child’s thumbs for calluses. This is a clear sign that texting is getting out of hand. Your kid may also start complaining about pain or cramps in the thumbs. This can be caused by severe overuse of the common digits used for texting, and warning bells should be ringing.
2. Runs into things – Is your child constantly running into things? Kids who are addicted to texting pay more attention to their phones than where they’re going, and take little notice of any obstacles that may be in their way.
3. Deformed neck – Does your child have a permanently bowed head because of a neck deformity? By looking down at a phone for extended periods of time, growing children can end up with a deformed neck.
4. Speaks in acronyms – When your kids actually talk to you instead of texting, do they speak in acronyms? Are they commonly saying things like OMG and LOL? If you find yourself beginning to wonder if they’ve learned a new language, you’re right. The inability to speak in complete sentences using real words is a clear sign of texting addiction.
5. Attached to phone – Has your child’s phone become a part of their anatomy? Are they continually within arm’s reach of their phone at all times? Are they constantly checking it for new messages? This is another sign you should be concerned.
6. Unaware of surroundings – Are your kids completely oblivious to their surroundings? Are they unaware of spectacular sunsets or a giraffe in the back yard? Children who are addicted to texting become so focused on their phones they ignore everything else.
7. Takes phone to bed – Is your child taking his phone to bed? Some kids will spend all night texting with their friends while their parents are completely unaware. This can lead to serious sleep deprivation and teachers will find them nodding off at school. If you suspect this, you may need to confiscate the phone at bedtime.
8. Panics attacks – If your son or daughter loses their phone, do they go into a panic attack? Kids who are addicted to texting become completely unhinged when separated from their phones. This is a serious sign of addiction that needs to be addressed.
9. Unable to function otherwise – If you take the phone away from your child, is he completely unable to function without it? Kids with serious texting addictions can have trouble functioning without the constant connection to others texting gives them.
10. Combative behavior – Does your child become combative when you confront him with his texting problem? This behavior is another sign of addiction. If this happens, you may need to schedule an intervention.

Can this texting epidemic be stopped, or is it too late? Is our youth condemned to deformed necks and callused thumbs, spending their lives completely oblivious to their surroundings? Even though this article is meant to be tongue in cheek, parents do have some reason to be concerned about their children and texting. If your child is displaying unusual behavior you may need to intervene. Remember that you are the parent and you pay the phone bill. Take action before your child is consumed by the texting craze. Kids these days may need a reminder that there is a world beyond their cell phone.

Children today are growing up with the Internet as a regular part of life, yet the World-Wide-Web was fairly new when their parents were young. Along with all the fun and informative things available to children online, a serious danger also lurks. Internet predators like to use the anonymity of the Internet, and are constantly on the lookout for innocent victims.

It’s important for parents to be aware of the ways sexual predators troll for kids online. Here are 10 things to watch out for to keep your kids safe on the Internet.

1. Online games – One place Internet predators connect with kids is online games. They will choose games that are popular with the age group they prefer and pose as other kids to foster a friendship with children. Predators will watch for gamer names that indicate the gender, location or other information that is useful to them.
2. Chat rooms – Sexual predators will pose as kids in chat rooms that are popular with children. This is an easy way for them to garner information and target unsuspecting youngsters. Once they gain a child’s trust, they may try setting up a meeting in person.
3. Facebook – Parents need to be very careful about whether or not they allow their children to have their own personal Facebook accounts. This is prime hunting grounds for Internet stalkers who target kids. It’s very easy for them to set up fake Facebook pages and “friend” teens and preteens.
4. Twitter – Social media is a great way for pedophiles to connect with their victims, and Twitter is no exception. Many young people use tweeting as their primary form of communication, and predators know this and go where the kids are.
5. Websites for kids – Parents may think websites like Disney and PBS Kids are safe for their children to frequent, but predators like to frequent them too. What better place is there to find lonely kids who want to chat?
6. Instant messaging – Since emails will linger in an account until they’re deleted, Internet predators prefer to use instant messaging that disappears once the window is closed. This makes it harder for parents to monitor who’s talking to their kids and what they’re saying.
7. MySpace – Some consider MySpace one of the worst sites for online predators who want to connect with children. The online surveys are fun to fill out, but they also provide lots of information that can be used to gain trust with unsuspecting youngsters.
8. Pictures – Parents need to educate their children on how pictures posted online can be used by sexual predators. It helps them to identify kids who fit their personal preferences, and any picture posted online can be used and manipulated by anyone. Child pornographers are constantly monitoring the Internet for potentially suggestive photos of children.
9. Target the vulnerable – Internet predators are constantly on the lookout for vulnerable children that they can exploit. Kids that are lonely, unhappy, who are having difficulty with school, or who have poor relationships with their parents are easy targets. They also like kids who are willing to keep secrets from their parents or other authorities.
10. Use coded language – The shortcut language that kids use for texting makes it harder for parents to readily understand what they’re saying. Just glancing over their child’s shoulder, a text message can look like gobbledygook, so parents need to learn this coded language to help keep their kids safe. You better believe the Internet predators know exactly what texting shortcuts mean and how to use it to gain a child’s trust.

Being aware of the inherit risks that the Internet poses to innocent children is the first step parents who want to keep their children safe need to take. Parents need to educate themselves and their children about the dangers of Internet predators as they teach them how to use the Web. Establish rules and guidelines for computer and cell phone use, and keep the computer in a common area easily observable by parents and siblings. Use online tools for privacy settings and set up parental alerts. Parental involvement is the key to protecting your children from online sexual predators.

By Nanny X, writer and advocate for childcare change who blogs at TheNannyTimebomb

Monday October 29^th, 2012, 5pm.

The skies of Manhattan are a brooding charcoal. Black clouds hang over the skyline like an apocalyptic doom. Hurricane Sandy is on her way but New Yorkers are already in the eye of a storm. A few days ago an unspeakable double murder perpetrated by a Nanny, Yoselyn Ortega, upon two small children (Leo, 2, ‘Lulu’ Lucia, 6) occurred. Ortega remains in a medically induced coma, as Police wait for her to heal before charging. Days on, the threads of the accused woman’s life are coming together. The consensus is that Nanny Ortega suffered a psychotic breakdown after a long bout of depression and financial troubles.

A full analysis of the case and the sequence of events can be found at http://thenannytimebomb.blogspot.com. But just to recap here are the facts: Marina Krim a pediatrician by training, was a stay at home mother of 3 small children, Lucia aged 6, Nessie aged 3, and Leo aged 2.  The family lived in a luxury apartment on the Upper West Side, Manhattan. Kevin Krim, her husband, is a senior VP at CNBC Digital.  The Krims hired Yoselyn Ortega after the birth of their third child Leo. Ortega originally from the Dominican Republic, is a U.S naturalized citizen. Ortega was introduced to the Krims via a friend.  The Krims traveled to the Dominican Republic and met Ortega’s relatives. Ortega lived with her sister (a temporary situation) and niece in Harlem, Manhattan. Ortega has a 17-year-old son and is separated from his father. Although the Krims paid her ‘well’ Ortega recently complained of being ‘broke’ and ‘tired’ to neighbors and friends. The Krims concerned about Ortega’s financial problems had helped her look for a 2nd baby-sitting job. Ortega had recently paid a visit or visits to a psychologist. She had begun to lose weight, looked haggard and was increasingly withdrawn and anxious.

The Krim’s apartment building on the Upper West Side, NYC.

Reactions

NYC moms are expressing their shock in a number of ways: physical upsets like vomiting and diarrhea, alternating between bouts of anxiety and tears, complete disbelief and shock. A few have put the entire situation down to the Krim case being a ‘one-off’, a rare psychotic breakdown that could not have been anticipated. The message boards and blogs reveal a wave of panic and hysteria, as working parents now second-guess the most intimate strangers in their homes: their nannies.

Curiously, the responses of Nannies have been a little different. While all nannies have expressed horror and sympathy for the Krims, a percentage have suggested that, “… there is more to the story than meets the eye”. There have also been hushed remarks between caregivers. The gist of these comments being that only now do privileged people grasp the impact of low wages, immigrant work and unfair demands routinely made upon nannies. A couple of nannies have also expressed fears over a racist backlash against foreign workers.

Leo Krim, 2, Lucia Krim, 6

Yoselyn Ortega by all accounts appears to have been – at least initially – a good nanny. Photographs shared on Marina Krim’s blog ‘Life with the Krim Children’ reveal happy images of Ortega with the Krims. Observations of Ortega by neighbors, relatives and friends have been mostly positive. But they have also revealed that Ortega had suffered financial setbacks, the full details of which are yet to be learned. The point is, that in a short matter of time Yoselyn Ortega had changed. In recent months she had begged others to help her sell jewelry, and had complained of working too hard. Relatives had taken her to a psychologist.

So what if anything can be gleaned from this seismic crime?

Nanny Yoselyn Ortega with two of the Krim children

First of all Yoselyn Ortega has yet to give her version of events. She lies in a catatonic state in hospital. It remains unknown whether Ortega had been prescribed any medication such as anti-depressants. SSRI drugs such as Prozac, Zoloft, Luvox and Paxil are anti-depressant drugs that have been linked to psychotic behavior in the past. 1 If Ortega had been prescribed an SSRI drug it might begin to explain both her withdrawn and glassy-eyed appearance and the sudden psychotic episode that led to two murders.

Even if Ortega had not been medicated it is now clear that she was in fact seriously depressed and anxious about money. Hindsight is 20/20 and it appears that the Krims tried everything they could to help Ortega, such as offering her extra hours and sourcing other baby-sitting jobs. Unfortunately simply working longer hours and ‘hustling’ for cash by selling make-up and jewelry may have exacerbated Ortega’s condition. It could have led to a ‘burn out’ where a nanny simply has no more emotional or physical resources left to offer. Add ‘burn out’ to extreme financial stress coupled with a prolonged depression, perhaps also an SSRI medication and the makings of a time bomb are self-evident.

What now?

Things must change in the childcare industry and slowly they are. Nanny agencies are now offering parents profile and personality testing of candidates. Screening references of prospective Nannies is becoming the norm. Running police and financial background checks are helping to weed out obvious offenders. But change must go further than that. In the Krim case the family had vetted Yoselyn Ortega even traveling to the Dominican Republic to visit her relatives. Marina Krim was a stay at home mother. Yoselyn Ortega had been a good employer.  This is not some Craigslist horror story.

If there is one positive legacy to take from the Krim case, it’s this: finally Americans get how important being a nanny really is. It behooves everyone to make sure that all childcare workers are fully covered by health insurance. Even basic health insurance covers mental health care. Employers shouldn’t just check in with their nanny at the first signs of job fatigue: tiredness, lack of motivation, passive aggressive behaviors, withdrawn appearance, anger and despondency. They should check in with their nanny on a weekly basis. Especially in this precarious economy where many Nannies are feeling the strain.

Caring for children requires teamwork. It cannot be a them versus us between parents and nannies. Nanny violence against children is an extremely rare event. Hundreds of thousands of nannies faithfully and diligently rise each morning and head to work. Everyday families are supported by the pivotal and consistent care of a good nanny.

Let us not forget that.

1. http://ssristories.com/show.php?item=3756
2. http://www.wildestcolts.com/psych_opp/b-psychiatric_drugs/9-senseless.html
3. http://afrafrontpagenews.blogspot.com/2012/07/dr-ann-blake-tracy-antidepressants-two.html

The Federal Bureau of Investigation’s National Crime Information Center estimates that roughly 2,000 children are reported missing every day. Luckily, the vast majority of missing children are found and their cases are resolved within hours; of those who aren’t immediately found, up to 49% are later found to have been abducted by a non-custodial parent or relative. 27% are kidnapped by an acquaintance, leaving only 24% at the hands of complete strangers. While the term “Stranger Danger” has a catchy ring to it, it’s actually a bit misleading because less than ¼ of all abducted children are taken by a stranger. This makes it extremely important to teach children about more than just stranger avoidance.

1. Most People Are Strangers – Realistically, the majority of the people that your child encounters throughout the course of his day are strangers. Instilling a fear of all strangers will only cause him to regard anyone he doesn’t know with fear, which could make it difficult for him to approach a stranger for help if he’s in need.
2. Avoid Absolutes – Saying things like “all strangers are bad,” or “never talk to anyone you don’t know, ever” only make it difficult for your child to navigate social encounters and unravel the mysteries of the world around him.
3. “Good” Strangers – Pointing out that kids can always turn to people in police or firefighters’ uniforms, teachers and other official authority figures can help him to understand the difference between strangers that wish him harm and those that can offer him assistance when he needs it.
4. No Gifts, Treats or Surprises – Let your child know that he shouldn’t accept any treats, presents or surprises from anyone that tells him that those gifts should be kept a secret. Making a policy of not accepting gifts from people he doesn’t know well is a wise idea.
5. Talk About “Tricky” People – Because most kids are abducted or sexually abused by people that they know it’s much more important for kids to learn about “tricky” people than “stranger danger.” A tricky person is anyone who asks him to keep a secret from his parents, to lie about where he’s been, or to go somewhere with them without talking to a parent first.
6. The Rules Apply to Big Kids, Too – Make sure that your child knows not to go anywhere with a tricky person, even if that person is an older kid. It’s easy for children taught about Stranger Danger to view adults as scary and other kids as always safe, but this isn’t always the case.
7. Encourage Kids to Ask Questions – In order to ensure that your child has a grasp of the concepts you’re teaching, have him ask you any questions that he wants. Let him know that he won’t be in any trouble, no matter what he asks. Your child needs to know that he can always trust you when he needs to talk about strangers, tricky people and trouble; presenting an opportunity to ask no-holds-barred questions on the subject can begin to build that trust.
8. Be Honest – It’s important to answer your child’s questions with age-appropriate honesty. Try not to evade questions, tell white lies, or otherwise subvert the truth when it comes to this very serious issue. Keep in mind that his questions are only an indication that he’s listening to what he’s being told, and is trying his best to process it.
9. Keep the Conversation Age-Appropriate – While it’s important to be honest and up-front with your child on the subject of abuse, Stranger Danger and abductions, you should also remember just how vivid your child’s imagination is. The child whose mind can turn a shadow on the wall into a lurking monster might not need all the gory details about a local abduction case.
10. Maintain an Ongoing Dialogue – It’s important to teach small children how to safely and responsibly handle situations with strangers and tricky people, but it’s also just as important to continue the conversation as your child ages. When he’s older, the focus may shift more to avoiding online predators and exploitation, but the basic concept is still the same and shouldn’t be abandoned after the first discussion.

Striking a balance between instructing kids on responsible behavior and outright fear-mongering is a challenge, but it’s one that you must face as a parent. While it’s of vital importance to educate your children regarding the best way to avoid abduction or abuse, it’s also important not to create anxiety and overwhelming fear of all strangers in his mind.